• Nikki Hynes

You Control Your Mindset

Updated: Oct 19, 2020



"The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new." -Socrates

Mindset is the most powerful tool you have in your control. You need to keep it positive on this journey we call life. It's your power to wield.You control your mindset. It is your responsibility. 100%.


That means you need to build it like a muscle. Challenging it and constantly working on it, just like you do with your body during a gym workout.


If you only think about and focus on the mistakes you make as you create change in your life, or how far you still have to go to reach your goals, you’ll get discouraged and quit because it becomes exhausting.


Now raise your hand if you've been there and done that. Please note: If you don't raise your hand you're lying and we both know it! We are all guilty of doing this and it's okay. #OwnYourOwnShit


We need to realize that the choices we make on a daily basis can make or break us. It is not until we take ownership of these choices that true change can begin to take shape.


If you spend the majority of your time blaming others and making excuses, change will be a difficult thing for you to achieve. It's going to take a lot of self-reflection and mindset work, but it's not impossible to achieve.


There are some simple, daily habits that we can begin implementing into our routines that can help us to flip the mindset switch. When you’re feeling frustrated and feel as if you are not making progress toward your goals, I want you to make a list. This list should have all of the new habits you’ve started to work on. It can even contain something you did today, that the old you would have never done. This might seem silly but trust me, it works! Kinda like mantras, but less embarrassing because you're writing this down instead of looking in the mirror and being your own hype man.


Once your list is complete, I want you to celebrate the f*ck out of it! This list is proof that you are making progress, even if it's small, and it's small changes over time that we truly want to strive for.


Examples of what could go on this list:

  • Ordered a lettuce wrap instead of a bun.

  • Only had a few fries or skipped the fries completely.

  • Boxed up half of my food when it arrived at the table so I could stick to portion control.

  • Woke up early to workout or read some personal development.

  • Did a workout after work, before falling into the Netflix trap.

  • Did a workout even though I really didn't want to.

  • Was kind to myself when I had an episode of emotional eating.

  • Enjoyed pizza without feeling like I needed to workout harder the next day.

  • Went to bed earlier/Slept in today

You get the point, right?!


These might sound like insignificant things, but these small changes in your habits will snowball into an avalanche of change in your life!


Small positive actions, compound over time to make drastic change.


Don't believe me, go read a book called The Compound Effect or The Slight Edge! (these are not affiliate links)


"You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine." -Darren Hardy

Making lists like this and celebrating all of your small wins help to keep your mindset positive and that's important.


Protecting our mindset when striving for change in our lives is not an easy thing thing to do, but it's key. Especially since change isn't always accepted openly by those closest to us.


Those closest to you should be supportive of the change you are trying to create. They should help you to celebrate your small accomplishments and remind you of them when you're feeling down. They should want to see you succeed...but they also need to call you out on your BS when you start spewing it. This is honestly the sign of someone who cares deeply for you, because they will want to see you succeed at conquering your bad habits, even if it might make you angry at them in the moment.


Sometimes we look at those closest to us and realize they are fueling the negative thoughts we have, or peer pressuring us into behavior that won’t help us to achieve our goals. This is never a fun place to find yourself in, especially when it involves family, but it's a reality that some of us face.


Unfortunately when this happens it usually calls for a tough conversation and depending on the outcome of it, you may need to put a little distance between you and that person. Never pleasant but putting yourself first is necessary here.


Don't forget, the positive influences in your life can be an on-line community! Not all of us are blessed to have people locally who are like minded or on a similar journey to ours, so use the resources you have at your finger tips (literally) to set up a support system for yourself.


Ultimately, it is up to us to protect and actively work on our mindset. It is easy to fall into the trap of negativity, so you need to be mindful of your thoughts and your actions.


Remember, small, gradual change is the goal. Looking at and celebrating the small successes we achieve on a daily basis is how we flip the mindset switch.


Slow and steady wins the race. Change is not a sprint, it is a marathon. (I wonder how many more cliches I can add here?)


We need to stop being in such a rush. Take your time with your mindset, chances are you have a lot of baggage that you need to unpack and address before you can confidently move on to the next habit you want to tackle. But I promise you, investing time into yourself is the best investment you can ever make!


Listen and subscribe to the podcast version of this blog HERE


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